Rural issues - losing the farm
Rural issues - losing the farm
Losing the farm is a highly distressing and difficult experience for a family. The impact can be compared to losing a loved one. In many cases, the farm has been in the family for generations. Losing it can feel like betraying one’s ancestors while robbing one’s children of their birthright. Grief, guilt, despair and depression are common reactions.
It isn’t always possible to turn to immediate family members for support - in some cases, the farm supports three generations (grandparents, parents and children) and its loss means the entire family is in turmoil. Overstretched families can benefit from professional support and advice on how to establish a new way of life. The transition may take some time.
Losing the farm – grief issues
Some of the grief issues families who lose their farm may face include:
loss of identity, since farming is a way of life, not just a job
feeling professionally lost, since most farmers couldn’t imagine doing anything else for a living
loss of the family home
a sense of having betrayed previous generations, if the farm was in the family for a long time
guilt over losing the only substantial inheritance for the children
feelings of guilt, failure and inadequacy.
People experience grief in different ways
Grief has many stages - you may not experience them all, or you may experience the stages in a different order than described here. Your family members may grieve in different ways to you, so try to respect each other’s feelings during this difficult time. Common feelings could include:
denial
– you can’t believe that your worst fears have come true
release
– physical expression of distress, including sobbing and intense feelings of sadness
restlessness
– physical reactions including sleeping problems and changes to appetite
isolation
– the need to pull back from other people and events, and spend time alone with your thoughts
remorse
– going back over decisions you had made, feeling regret and wishing you could undo the past
panic
– the inability to think clearly or perform everyday chores
confusion
– you feel unable to make decisions or plan for the future
anger
– you start looking for people, organisations or things to blame for your loss
idealisation
– looking back with rose-coloured glasses and romanticising your life on the farm
vulnerability
– certain things trigger painful memories and feelings; for example, the anniversary of leaving the farm could provoke tears
acceptance
– the emotional realisation that things have changed
confidence
– the ability to look towards your new future with hope and optimism.
Problems facing farm families
Farm families who lose their farms may need a variety of types of help. These may include:
information
referral services
social support
emotional support
financial counselling
financial support
education and training for new careers
job hunting assistance
house hunting assistance
assistance for children relocated to new schools.
Seek professional help
Farmers typically pride themselves on their self-sufficiency and independence, so asking for help can be hard to do. In other cases, the family members may not be aware of the extensive range of organisations, both community and government, that are available to offer assistance. It might be a good idea when consulting with an organisation to ask if there are any other contacts they could suggest.
Where to get help
Department of Energy, Environment and Climate
Action
External Link
, Customer Service Centre Tel.
136 186
CRANAplus Bush Support
Services
External Link
24-hour phone counselling service Tel.
1800 805 391
Lifeline
External Link
Tel.
13 11 14
Australian Women in
Agriculture
External Link
Tel.
0490 346 195
Victorian Rural Women’s
Network
External Link
Farmsafe
Australia
External Link
Tel.
(02) 6269 5622
National Debt
Helpline
External Link
Tel.
1800 007 007
Monday to Friday, 9.30 am to 4.30 pm
–
a free financial counselling and debt advice phone service for Australians (includes interpreter services)